Wednesday, April 13, 2011

DWF Asks - Speed Dating: Hype or Hope?

A new social website touting a new speed dating business recently appeared on several Facebook pages. Wondering how anyone could venture into THAT, I took a look.

The events have the women and men broken into groups by age and it looks as if the first speed dating events are being planned. From what I saw, it's $35 for an event, and you get five minutes with each "date", with a total of 20 men and women. You have a card and mark an interest in any of the dates you'd like to see again. If both parties express an interest in each other, emails are sent to both parties, and you take it from there.

While I've never actually participated in a speed dating event, it looks interesting, but I have a few questions:

1. Are the backgrounds of the participants checked out? Criminal background? Sex offender?

2. Is there security at the event, in case of an infatuation-stalker incident happening, i.e., someone walks you to your car?

3. If none of the participants have an interest in each other, do you get another event free?

This appears to be a good way to meet new people without spending time on blind dates, or hanging out in bars, so I'm open to the idea, how about you?

54 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm married so won't be participating but I think it's a great idea! Larger cities have been doing it for years, it's about time something like this comes to Jackson. I'd have definately done this when I was single, it's so hard to meet single people in Jackson without going to bars. Even if you don't make a "love connection" you've had a good time and have had a chance to meet some new people.

Cindy Cobb/ Face 2 Face Owner said...

JJ,
Thanks you! Face 2 Face Social is a way of making connections with people in a safe environment where the event is private & structured. The services that we offer are Speed Dating, Speed Networking, and Society Socials.

The answer to your questions:
1. No, there is no criminal background. But...you have to pre register and pay using your credit card and you have to give certain information that weeds out most of the rift raft. ALSO, THEY HAVE TO SHOW THEIR IDENTIFICATION CARD WHEN REGISTERING AT THE DOOR. (I am pretty sure Mint, Char, and Underground 119 does not do these kind of background checks either and those are places where some people go to meet other singles. (not too effective)

2. The events will be held at venues like Olga's, Underground 119, Burgers & Blues, AJ's on the Lake, Sal & Mookies, and other fine establishments in the Jackson MetroPlex. The concept for F2F Social is to create the "meet", not to be a body guard or babysitter. In saying that, it is up to the attendee to get someone to walk her to her car or him if they feel uncomfortable, just as they would do at another event. And just as I have done a few times at different events/concerts in the Jackson MetroPlex. Safety is number one concern and this is another reason why I am so passionate about F2F, but it is up to the individual to be cautious. Most of the speed dating events will be over by nine o'clock in the evening. They are invited to stay at the venue to listen to the music and continue to 'mingle with the singles' if they choose.

3. Just like there is no guarantee or money back option that you will like a concert, wine tasting event or any other entertainment event, there is no refund option to go to another event free. There will not be a match every time, (out of 15-20 mini-dates, this usually doesn't happen) but we do not give another event free. In my research, sometimes it takes two to three times to really find your match. In saying that, the price will be variable depending upon the venue and what is included. But...for $35.00, where can you meet 15-20 potentials Face 2 Face for 4-5 minutes in under two hours? Talk about time efficiency! We professional singles are too busy and frankly don't want to waste time and money on a two hour date with one person to see if we are a a match. This cuts to the chase! Within the five minutes, 99% of the people know if there is a connection or not. At the beginning of the event, you are given a 'rate the date' match card and with each mind-date, you check yes or no. At the end of the event, you turn your match card in and will receive an email within 24 hours with your MUTUAL MATCHES. If there is no match, you are welcomed and encouraged to sign up for another event (and pay for it).

The Speed Networking has the same concept as the speed dating, but is for business connecting.

Society Socials are "themed" events where any one 21 and above can attend. I am having a Society Social on April 29th at Olga's Fine Dining that is called "Royal Wedding Watchers" to celebrate the marriage of Prince William and Lady Kate. We are rolling out the red carpet to watch the event and will have a wedding watching, reception with cake and entertainment by Hunter Gibson. THIS IS A LADIES NIGHT OUT....SO LADIES ONLY TO THIS ONE.

Please check out my Facebook fan page, Face 2 Face Social and my website www.facde2facesocial.com for more information....
.....REGISTER to an event TODAY!
Thanks again JJ.....hope to see you at an event!!

Anonymous said...

Just hope that it won't be the same crowd everytime at every meeting. Seems like all of the Jackson singles already hang out together in a group and know each other.

Anonymous said...

Anyone who thinks that paying with a credit card and showing identification will somehow, inexplicably, weed good from bad should see a shrink first.

Considering the threats to women in the times we live in professional female singles who are "too busy" and "frankly don't want to waste time" will reap all the negatives this shortsighted approach will sow.

To each his own but this is an approach ripe to be abused and detrimental to women.

Anonymous said...

Anywhere else you meet single people you haven't had someone else do a background check. If I'm going out with someone I don't know well I google them anyway to make sure they haven't been in the news for criminal behavior! I think we all know how to be smart when going out with someone for the first time.... Meet them at the location instead of having them come to your home, go to public places, let friends know where you'll be and call them on the way home, etc. We're talking about adults here, not children.

Anonymous said...

8:57 "Considering the threats to women in the times we live in professional female singles who are "too busy" and "frankly don't want to waste time" will reap all the negatives this shortsighted approach will sow.

To each his own but this is an approach ripe to be abused and detrimental to women."

Can you cite any evidence or statistics that this is what has happened with similar operations in other cities? This concept has been around long enough in big cities for problems to have surfaced, if they have.

Anonymous said...

If a man is looking for an opportunity to abuse a women I doubt they are going to pay $35, have their identity verified, and be in a public group of people (witnesses) like this. Good grief! This seems like the safest way to meet other singles other than church to me!

Cindy Cobb/ Face 2 Face Owner said...

The attendees are encouraged not to sign up for the same age groupings twice in a row. That is why the ages overlap to give options. One of the main reasons that I investigated speed dating was because my group of single friends would go to different events around town and see MANY different groups of singles that we did not know. In the Jackson MetroPlex (twenty mile paramete), 46% are single. This concept will bring all these singles together, if they choose to step out of their box.
While I understand that I will receive negativity, there is really no need to say that I need a shrink. You can be negative in a respectful way, just as I will be positive to you in a respectful way as I respond to your statement.
I AM A PROFESSIONAL SINGLE WOMAN who attends at least 15 functions/events/networking gatherings each month. I know all the threats....but they are not just at these events, they are everywhere. Just last week a lady was raped at 2pm in the afternoon on a busy street behind a gas station. RIGHT IN JACKSON MISSISSIPPI.....In my research and questioning many of my single friends, both male and female, the quote "too busy to waste time on a two hour date to see if there is a connection" came from every single one of them, including myself. Many singles have children who have activities that coincide with their social lives, including dating. This gives them the option to meet more than one potential at a time and is proven to be VERY effective in other cities. I thank you for your comments, but frankly I prefer to stay positive on the course of helping people make connections to find LOVE, network their business effectively, and have fun outings that are different than other for singles and marrieds.....Happy Wednesday Smiles to you and I send you positive vibes...

Cindy Cobb

Anonymous said...

Women are more likely to be raped by a date or casual/infrequent acquaintance than by a husband, ex-husband, partner they live with or by a stranger.

Look it up.

Mouth Meet Foot said...

Cindy Cobb, April 13, 2011 9:22 AM:

I know all the threats....but they [i.e. the threats] are not just at these events, they are everywhere.

Anonymous said...

yea and you may get struck by lightening coming out of your house, or a fatal car wreck, look it up. I think its a great idea and hope it brings many people together for happiness. It would be a safe environment but i would say it is probably not for the shy or those who are not exactly street savy.

Candice Brewster said...

To the person who posted above......whaaat? No wonder you did so anonymously! I find your attitude offensive and degrading to women. When you are single, you never know where you'll be when you meet a potential date or your future partner. We, as intelligent beings, have to use common sense and reasoning when we meet someone, no matter where that may take place, to decide for ourselves if they are decent, trustworthy men. Good heavens, one could meet someone in a single's class at church and feel comfortable enough to meet them for dinner and that person turn out to be a dangerous creep! To my knowledge, churches don't do background and criminal checks before they allow one to join a singles' group or even have people in their homes for small group studies. I don't believe that it should be the responsibility of Miss Cobb to do background checks on the men and women that participate in her events. As adults, it's up to us to use good common sense. Miss Cobb is simply providing a venue and opportunity to make an initial connection with someone. It is then up to those individuals to make sound decisions after that. Frankly, it's just as likely that a man could meet a crazy, unstable stalker female at one of these events.

Your comment that this approach is detrimental to women is, franky, a dangerous one and just the type of attitude that is ruining this country. We should ALL be responsible for our own actions and decisions, not the government, not dating sites, not our friends and family. Please stop thinking that it's everyone else's responsibility but our own to live our lives for us and to be held accountable for our decisions and mistakes.

Anonymous said...

I suggest the person who recommended the shrink find one for him/herself... I assume you stay locked in your home all the time to protect yourself with a weapon clutched to your side? You sound a bit paranoid to me. How exactly do you recommend meeting other singles? You probably aren't meeting many out there in lala land where you obviously live!!

Anonymous said...

Being that I am married, I will not be attending, but I think that the concept is a good one. As far those wanting to know if participants are screened . . . does someone screen those who you meet out in other places? Remember that each one of us is responsible for our own safety and just because an event is organized doesn't mean that you let your guard down! There are no guarantees in life, just use your common sense, and when the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, or that little voice is telling that something is just not quite right, then listen and take the appropriate action. Good luck with your new venture!

Anonymous said...

US Dept of Justice:

43% of rapes occur between 6:00pm and midnight.

The average age of a rapist is 31 years old.

52% of rapists are white.

Anonymous said...

US Dept of Justice:

99.6% of female rape victims were raped by a male.

18.2% of male rape victims were raped by a female.

Anonymous said...

I think it is a great idea, however was appalled to see that events were listed as open only to caucasians. I find this unbelievable.

Cindy Cobb/ Face 2 Face Owner said...

Anonymous, 10:06,

I am creating events for Speed Dating Events for Professional Black Singles Only also. I am trying to get them on the calendar as fast as I can....please check back within the next few days. I am a one woman show right now starting this adventure, so it's going to take me a little time. The first event is scheduled for April 25th, so there will be plenty of time for attendees to register for the different events.

And.......my Society Socials are open to all...April 29th.

And...I am working on the first Speed Networking event....open to all as well....

Please be patient, I will have them posted soon.

Thank you!

Anonymous said...

When alcohol or drugs are involved the odds for rape go exponential. What is unbelievable is that your Face 2 Face Social $39 fee includes a cocktail.

Anonymous said...

@10:24am, I am sorry for whatever it was that happened to you, but you need to get a life! How is this any different than meeting someone in a bar, where alcohol is also served? What are you upset about, that someone might find happiness with someone other than yourself OR that you can't come up with your own business to operate? Give it a rest, please!!!

Anonymous said...

Good lord. If anyone ever complains about why Jackson doesn't have an active nightlife, you can simply look to these morons that are posting in response to Cindy's good idea.

Speed dating has been around for a long time in larger cities. It's a positive, safe environment to meet someone briefly and chat. No more, no less. All good things.

What I find so interesting is that, as usual, some asshole comes on here and starts churning up irrational fear of rape, assault, etc., as a reason not to have this business. This is a chip on Jacksonians' collective shoulder.

Then, you have the other asshole who attacks Cindy because she's doing a "caucasians only" event. As she noted, she's also doing an "African-Americans only" event, and she is trying to offer an event for everyone in general.

Why don't you give her a little room to grow before playing the race card?

Andrew Newcomb

Anonymous said...

I'm female and engaged. I have no problem with the concept. I hope everyone involved will think clearly and be safe. But I am very disappointed that people here are attacking others who urge caution about situations conducive to date rape. Kingfish always identifies his paid advertisements. This isn't one of them. Violence against women is real. Browbeating others who bring it up and calling them assholes doesn't make it any less so.

Anonymous said...

Good lord Newcomb. Looks like you've decided to jump right into the name calling.

Anonymous said...

Where does it say caucasians only? I don't see it.

Anonymous said...

I found it, never mind. Is there going to be a mixed-race social for those who prefer to date out of their race? How about a Gay/Lesbian social? Just asking, no haters.

Anonymous said...

What I find so interesting is that, as usual, some asshole comes on here and starts churning up irrational fear of rape, assault, etc., as a reason not to have this business.

I don't see it anywhere the mention of not having the business.

Anonymous said...

I am confused as to why one would ever hold an event just for one race, especially in Mississippi? I thought we were all God's children and why would any kind of exclusion be perpetuated.

Anonymous said...

Don't hold your breath on the LGBT mixers. No doubt Ladd is already going to have a severe Groupon reaction to those race specific events.

Anonymous said...

Ms. Cobb seems sincere in her efforts, and the idea seems very good. Maybe in response to the comments, the events could be modified to be inclusive.

Cindy Cobb/ Face 2 Face Owner said...

Anonymous 11:54:

The business will not be exclusive to one race....as stated above. I am working on the calendar of events with the different categories daily.
Just as JJ has the right to screen all comments and is the final judge on which comment is posted her on JJ, I too will have full control when creating events that are marketable and profitable....this is a business.

The speed dating events will be categorized based on market and profitability in the Jackson MetroPlex. Just as every other business in our area is.
If you don't fit in the category of the event, do not register to attend.

Rebekah said...

Some people could mess up a wet dream. What is the big deal? "abuse of women....detrimental to women..." Is it any wonder you are still SINGLE???
I think this is a fabulous idea for single people. What is the big deal? Singles meeting other singles...What is the problem here? Online dating, speed dating, matchmakers- it is the way of the future now. Sorry if you are still holding onto that naive possibility that you are going to meet Mr or Mrs wonderful at church....

Why can't all of you debbie downers just give it a rest already. If you don't agree then DON'T GO! It is that simple! Sit around and drown in your self pity on your lonely date nights by yourself, in front of the tv, with your dog, and your chocolate icecream...

If I were single I would be completely up for this. You get to meet these people face to face (Hence the name- witty huh) in a public setting..You aren't getting bogus pictures online from some pathetic loser claiming to be an athletic doctor, but in reality the person is sitting on top of a hundred Big Mac wrappings and has a mad skills at photoshop.

Bottom line is this- Let Cindy try to succeed before you knock her down. Quit all the catty bitching and the OVERLY dramatic feminist bullshit....Alot of singles are interested in this and I hope it is a success. Cindy is a brilliant business woman and I wish her the best....
Not to mention the fact she is beautiful....so I think some of you are just a tad bit jealous of her...Just sayin

Anonymous said...

Wow, it is disappointing when a discussion about the startup of a speed dating service by a local individual ends up being a forum where near paranoia by one individuals fixation on date rape overwhelms the original subject. While I agree date rape is serious,focusing only on that by an individual is concerning about their own mental health. I like the way Ms Cobb defended her position in a positive way and understand why other males responded much more defensively as the individual cannot seem to let it go. Take the date rape agenda to another site and quit tearing down a new business before it starts.

Rebekah said...

AMEN 1:38!!!

Anonymous said...

As to the issue of inclusion, Ms Cobb is just now setting up events and working out the kinks of what does and doesnt work will take time. Yes, there or those of all races who like to date outside their races. But there is a larger contingent of all races who prefer to date within their race. When someone is paying for contacts, they want as many as possible. I am sure she will look at adding others in future that will accomodate all factions. Relax people.

Anonymous said...

Of course it is a business. Where has anyone posted above otherwise? But dear, dear Rebekah if you or Ms. Cobb want to control the commentary to only that which you find acceptable then maybe you should consider your own blogs. No one forces you to read anything here. It is that simple. And the bottom line is that despite your boatload of red herrings no one is inhibiting Ms. Cobb from being successful. Look within Rebekah when looking for drama queens.

Anonymous said...

Look within Rebekah when looking for drama queens.

Donna...go back to your cave.

Anonymous said...

look no further to see how society is being ripped apart than when the subjects of blogs becomes a name calling tantrum. and yes we all are guilty. these innocents subjects become about left and right and right and wrong and your momma jokes. is it the recession is it the society strain of change or is the apacolypse gonna be death from with in

Anonymous said...

Have a pal who lives in a major city (grew up in Ridgeland) and LOVES speed dating. He swears on average he gets laid after only two dates. He sez sometimes he'll compromise on looks and check the box if she has a great body.

Anonymous said...

That's just lovely. Thanks for sharing.

KaptKangaroo said...

Sorry, didn't sign in on the "douchebag" comment.

KK

KaptKangaroo said...

Given the great odds my comment got flushed...

I think this is a great idea. It is about time we stop fearing one another because we live in fear of eachother. Give me a friggin' break.

The extremes that are being brought up are just that, extreme. I would hope that personal responsibility and the general IQ of the folks that actually find and frequent this site would lend itself to being safe.

Otherwise, the naysayers of the concept should just sit at home, lock the doors, sit in front of the TV and suck up the fear.

My motto: Be smart. Have fun. Life is short, enjoy every moment.

Rebekah said...

"look within Rebekah when looking for drama queens"...
What are you the dalai lama? And it does sound like the nonsense from Donna Ladd...Poor thing...

I think this is going to be a good thing for Jackson singles...and a way for business associates to network. Good luck Cindy!

Anonymous said...

Kangaroo,

I couldn't agree more. Living in fear is a ridiculous way to approach something as innocuous as a speed dating service.

Let this woman get her business going. It's nothing but a positive for Jacktown.

Andrew Newcomb

Debbie McCollum said...

Good Luck, Cindy!!! I have always known you to be fair! You will succeed!

Debbie McCollum

Anonymous said...

"look within Rebekah when looking for drama queens"...
What are you the dalai lama? And it does sound like the nonsense from Donna Ladd...Poor thing...

Rebekah:
LMAO!!! I agree it does sound like Donna Ladd. Loved your response!!! You go girl!!

Anonymous said...

How about try this link if they are so scared OR here's a better idea, DON'T ATTEND?! Let us not forget, some of these dirt bags may NOT have registered as the law requires that they do, because they are CRIMINALS! So you will still have to take responsibility for yourself.

http://www.nsopr.gov/Core/OffenderSearchCriteria.aspx?Advanced=1

Anonymous said...

LOS ANGELES (CBS) — A California woman claims she was sexually assaulted by a man she met on the popular online dating site Match.com, and now she’s suing the site, saying they need to do more to prevent similar attacks.

CBS2 spoke to the attorney representing the suspect in the case, confirming he has had problems with laws in the past. The alleged victim said because of that, he and other people like him should be banned from using sites like Match.com.

On Thursday, attorneys for the woman announced they were filing a civil lawsuit against the site. The woman, a Hollywood executive who wants to remain anonymous, said she was sexually assaulted by a man she met through the site, and she wants the site to stop adding users until a sexual predator screening process is installed.

Anonymous said...

unfortunatly this shit happens every 15 minutes somewhere in the world as well as someone who dies of lung cancer. you play with fire one day you will get burned

Anonymous said...

Having read so many of DWF's posts from long ago I'd say the only downside of this speed dating business is that, at least initially, she won't be able to speed date anyone 10+ years her junior.

Anonymous said...

LOS ANGELES — Singles website Match.com will begin screening its users against the national sex offender registry after a woman filed a lawsuit against the company saying she had been assaulted by someone she met through the dating service.

Guess using a credit card and having to show ID isn't really the deterrent some here would have you believe.

Anabanano said...

Well Cindy, maybe you will include getting attendees to sign a release when they present ID...just in case? :D I'm sure we have some single attorney friends that would be glad to draw one up for you pro bono.

Seriously folks, we are grownups. The same safety rules would apply here as when you go to other events. Be aware, walk to your cars in groups or with a male friend or employee, do the normal due diligence you would do on anyone else you would consider dating, carry mace, you get the point…right? This sounds like a great idea and an opportunity to meet other singles as a potential love interest or maybe just make some new friends.

And while on that note, Cindy when will you post an event for ladies that like their men tall dark and Latin??? Aw come on people…lighten up! Cheers and good vibes right back atcha Cindy!

Anonymous said...

For the anonymous, obsessed paranoic(s) out there: Did you know that 99.9999% of rape victims did NOT meet their attacker through a dating service, speed or otherwise? Should we require background checks on everyone, everywhere before a first date?

Like Casey Stengel (or Yogi Berra) said: You could look it up ;-)

Anonymous said...

Searched on this:

"99.9999% of rape victims did NOT meet their attacker through a dating service"

It came up with 99.9999% of nothing to support your exaggerated claim.


I don't know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.
-- Casey Stengel

Anonymous said...

The onus is on YOU to prove that 99.9999% of rape victims DID meet their attackers through a dating service. We'll wait while you gather and post your evidence. So far you have posted a handful of isolated incidents from a country of 300,000,000 people - not very persuasive, I'm afraid.



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